A list of some latest Rajnikanth jokes. Thanks to the huge fan following, of Rajnikanth... that people around have given their direct and indirect contributions to this collection of some newest funny and hilarious Rajni jokes.

Before you watch Robots, Know this about Rajnikant
Some facts about Rajnikant from his films:
1. Rajnikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can’t be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajnikant is shot in the head. To everybody’s surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Rajnikant!
2. In another movie, Rajnikant is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajnikant has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. He throws the knife at the middle gangster & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
3. Rajnikant is chased by a gangster. Rajnikant has a revolver but no bullets in it. Rajnikant waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajnikant opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang… the gangster dies…
4. Rajnikant gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. Rajnikant has to desperately kill the villain because it’s the climax. Rajnikant suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.

• Joke - 1:)
  

Name: Rajnikanth
Hobbies: Playing with lions, swimming with tsunami, skating in volcano, catching bullets when
Someone shoots, running against flying plane, playing with lightning
The legend of India……

• Joke - 2:)
  

Rajnikant was studying in 3rd STD....someone stole his rough note....and
Now they call it as .............Wikipedia
Crazy people!!!!

• Joke - 3:)
  

When Rajnikant was a Student……..
Teachers use to Bunk the classes!!!

• Joke - 4:)
  

Rajnikant started college. All student were confused while taking admission because name of college is
“Rajnikant's Medical College of Engineering for Commerce”.

• Joke - 5:)
  

Rajnikant purchased a road roller…
Guess why??????
To Iron his Clothes……………………………

• Joke - 6:)
  

Rajnikant was shot today...
.
.
.
Funeral of the bullet is tomorrow…J

• Joke - 7:)
  

THE MOST NEGLECTED FACT OF THE ENTIRE DECADE!!!!
Once a farmer replaces scare crow in the farm with Rajnikant’s statue…
..And Birds returned grains they took last year as well

• Joke - 8:)
  

Rajinikant got 150 questions in exam paper asking - "Solve any 100 questions"
He solved all 150 and wrote, " Rascalla!, CHECK ANY 100!"

• Joke - 9:)
  

What do you think Vodafone 3G tag line should be:-
Faster..
Better…
RAJNIKANT….

No it should be (strictly)

RAJNIKANT.
RAJNIKANT...
RAJNIKANT…

Mind it…!!!

• Joke - 10:)
  

Rajni can walk faster than light….
“Rajni cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be changed from one form to another”.

• Joke - 11:)
  

Once, a photo of Rajnikant was given for Xerox. Don’t even try to guess what happened…
We got two copies of the Xerox machine.

• Joke - 12:)
  

Once upon a time
Rajnikant used Tooth Powder to get strong teeth
Today that powder is known as….
“AMBUJA CEMENT”

• Joke - 13:)
  

Micheal Jordan to Rajini: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you?
Rajni: Rascala; how do you think the earth spins!?

• Joke - 14:)
  

If you spell ‘Rajanikant’ wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Rajinikanth?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”

• Joke - 15:)
  

If Rajnikant was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.

• Joke - 16:)
  

“Who says the world will be destroyed in Dec 2012…..Rajnikant just bought a Laptop with three Years warranty”…..

• Joke - 17:)
  

Tonight at 9 Rajani can be seen in the sky… as he is participating in the Asian Games’ high jump Event…

• Joke - 18:)
  

The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajnikant kicked one of the corners off.

• Joke - 19:)
  

When Rajanikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid
enough to get in between Rajanikanth and Rajanikanth.

• Joke - 20:)
  

When Rajnikanth is asked to kill someone he doesn’t know, he shoots the bullet and directs it The day he finds out.

• Joke - 21:)
  

Once Rajnikanth was playing cricket... He played a defensive shot...now that BALL is called Pluto.

• Joke - 22:)
  

There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up.

• Joke - 23:)
  

Recently, China airports were closed due to heavy fog, later it was discovered that Rajnikant was having hookah in India

• Joke - 24:)
  

Nokia Launching Rajnikant 'R' Series In 2012.
Features: 20 SIMS,
Battery Standby: 1 Year,
1000 GB Memory,
100 Megapixels Camera,
TV,
Oven,
Washing Machine,
Fridge,
AC,
Mini Rocket Launcher,
Mini AK-47 &
The New Special Feature 24G In Which U Can Meet The Person & Talk Directly.

• Joke - 25:)
  

Once Death had ‘near Rajnikant experience’!
When GOD is shocked he exclaims “Oh my Rajnikaant!”

• Joke - 26:)
  

Once, Rajnikant was having a cup of tea. Suddenly, in his typical style he cut the tea into half. Since then, we know our popular cutting chai.

• Joke - 27:)
  

Once Dinosaurs borrowed money from Rajnikant and refused to pay him back... That was the last time anyone saw Dinosaurs.

• Joke - 28:)
  

One night, a ghost was consoling another, "Don't worry, I told you it's all in your mind... There is nothing like Rajnikant".

• Joke - 29:)
  

Girl Romantic Mood Mein Rajnikanth Se Boli.
Girl: Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat, Tum Kya Jaano ?
Rajnikanth: 0.00078924576 Rs. Per Gram

• Joke - 30:)
  

When you search Rajini in Google, what does Google say?
"I'm Feeling Lucky”!

• Joke - 31:)
  

How does Rajni do Shirshasan?
He simply turns the world upside down.

• Joke - 32:)
  

This message has been sent by Rajnikanth in the interest of humanity.
"Stop making jokes on me otherwise I will delete your FORWARD option"

• Joke - 33:)
  

DHOOM-3 Scene:
John, Hritik, Aamir on BIKE with speed of 2000km/hr.
And suddenly, Rajnikanth overtakes them with Bicycle
And says
..
..
..
“Save Fuel Use cycle"

• Joke - 34:)
  

Once Rajnikant was on the hot seat of KBC....
And the computer needed lifeline to choose the question. Mind it!

• Joke - 35:)
  

Q: Why does rajnikanth wear sunglasses?
A: To protect the sun from his eyes!

• Joke - 36:)

Gabbar: Kitne Admi the?
Kaliya: Sarkar 1
Gabbar :Aur tum?
Kaliya: 100
Gabbar: fir b wapas aa gaye woh b khali hath,kaun tha woh?
Kaliya: RAJNI...
Gabbar: Oops! Sorry my mistake Chai wai pe bula lete hai sir ko...

• Joke - 37:)
  

Contrary to popular belief, Rajnikant cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down.

• Joke - 38:)

Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss…The next day announcement was made… Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aye...

• Joke - 39:)

When Rajnikanth get angry at the Sun, it hides behind the moon… that phenomenon is called Solar eclipse.

• Rajnikant runs until the treadmill gets tired
  

• Some magicans can walk on water, Rajnikant can swim through land
  

• Rajnikant is lovin’ it! – Macdonald’s new tagline

• When Pope walks with Rajanikanth, People ask “Who is that guy in robe?”

• Whenever Rajnikanth makes an error, it’s an invention.

• In Rajnikanth’s wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajnikanth and his wife

• Rajnikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box

• Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajnikanth

• Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks

• Once Rajnikant was caught on the highway for over speeding… while walking…

• The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Rajnikant out. It failed miserably

• If Rajnikant gets into a car accident (yeah right) His car will need some airbags to protect it from him.

• The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajnikanth are his films.

• When Rajnikanth walks on road, he actually does not walk, the road walks under him....

• An e-mail was sent from pune to mumbai and Rajnikanth stopped it in lonavala.

• Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth’ leg, after five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

• Rajanikanth makes onions cry.

• The new symbol for the Rupee is actually Rajnikanth’s Signature.

• The ice age ended when Rajnikant lost his cool.

• Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

• Rajnikant had died 20 yrs ago...death hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

• Why did Superman and Batman visit Rajnikant? Because it was Teachers Day!

• When Rajnikant switches on his AC without closing the door, winter starts in India.

• Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth.

• Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call!!

• Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanth’s PC will crash.

• People update status via BlackBerry, iPhone, iPad, etc.Rajinikanth updates status via Calculator

• Rajnikant sneezed only once in his entire life. That was when the tsunami hit.

• Rajinikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.

• Rajnikanth can produce fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes

• Rajinikanth is a champion in the game “Hide n’ seek”, as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.

• Once Rajnikant forgot his toys near Mumbai; that place is now known as Essel World.

• Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.

• Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

• When Rajinikant croses the Road, the cars have to look left and right before moving.

• Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.

• Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes

• Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano

• Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced!

• Rajnikant got his driver's license at the age of 16 seconds.

• Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them.

• Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald’s, and got it.

• Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

• Initially, Superman couldn't fly. Then he met Rajnikant. You see, fear gives you wings!!!

• Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.

• When Rajnikant logs on to facebook.com, facebook updates its status message!

• Rajni once killed 20 men just by saying "BANG"

• Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret.

• Rajinikanth can divide by zero.

• Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.

• When Rajinikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

• “Rajnikanth doesn’t breathe…air comes to hide in his lungs”

• One day Rajani thought to play cricket in monsoon and rain stopped due to play….

• Rajnikant’s house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

• Rajnikant grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

• Rajnikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills, they just made him blink.

• Where there is a will, there’s a way. Where there is Rajnikant, there is no other way!!

• Rajanikanth can build a snowman…. out of rain.

• Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.

• One day Rajnikant bunked school. Since then it is known as Sunday.

• Rajanikanth can drown a fish.

• Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

One DAY, naasa scientists found something is flying in mars. They become happy and shouted – ‘life on mars, life on mars’

Later they found

That

.

.

….

.

.

rajnikant was flying a kite on mars from earth……………..

Girlfriend: Mera koi picha karte rehta hai…

Rajni: ok...

Next day…

Girlfriend: Hey… where the hell is My Shadow????

Someday Rajnikanth got angry with her mother and threw away her dinner set

Today people refer to them as flying saucer n ufo.

All scientists failed but rajnikanth did…

Q-which liquid turns solid on heating?

Ans-DOSA…

Rajnikant’s ammunition suddenly got over and a villain came in front of him and instantly died because,

.

.

Rajnikant shouted “DHISHKYAAOON”

Once James bond shoot a person and said I’m bond, James bond.

Climax:

But the person catches the bullet and throws at bond & bond dies

The person says

“I m kanth, rajnikanth”

Headline of Today... Ek train cycle ki chapet main ayi... Train main sawar sbhi log mare gaye...

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.

.

News: Cycle driver “RAJNIKANT” Farrar :-) Ek train cycle ki chapet main ayi... Train main sawar sbhi log mare gaye...

.

.

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News: Cycle driver “RAJNIKANT” Farrar

Finally scientists get success in finding actual reason of tsunami

.

.

.

Rajnikant was swimming in the ocean that day!

Rajnikanth went to world cooking championship

Of course rajni won.

But

Guess

What did he make in final???

Lal mirchi ki meethi kheer.

Rajni rocks…!!!

The death of Micheal jackson is revealed

.

.

.

The day before he died

He saw Rajanikanths Dance

And he got shocked

.

.

.

Because rajani had performed “SUN WALK”

When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn’t lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.

Who can stop fifty cars with one hand?

.

.

.

.

.

.

Trafic police.

Kya yaar,

har baar RAJNIKANTH thodi hoga….

Rajnikant is thinking of changing his name to ‘Rajnikan’

.

.

.

Because.

.

He understands that there really isn’t anything like ‘Rajni can’t....’!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rajnikant was born on 30 February

.

.

.

Since then February decided not to give this day to anybody else. Mind It.

Remake of TITANIC, Rajnikant is the hero. But climax changed. At the end Rajnikant survived through Pacific Ocean: ‘Girl friend in one hand and Titanic in the other hand’. Ship was saved with a BAMBOO STICK.

Now…. Its official…..

.

.

.

The missing piece of Apple’s Logo was eaten by.

Mr. Rajnikant!! MIND IT…!!!

Just like Match Stick Rajnikanth throws Saucer after drinking tea – silly NASA call it UFO

Rajnikanth’s Next movie is called Twitter

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.

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He plays 140 Characters in It.!!

What was the cause of recession in 2008?

.

.

.

Rajnikant lost his wallet!!!!

Breaking News NASA closed.

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.

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Rajnikant bought all the rockets for diwali….

Happpy Diwali!!!

This can't be beaten!! Yesterday Rajnikanth adopted Two elephants, Two camels & Two horses from the Zoo... Do you know why??? . . . . . . "To play chess!!"

Eat Parle G, Do Not Eat Tiger! Only 1411 Left

Superstar Rajinikanth say thanks to aishwarya rai for acting with him by quoting a funny incident. very funny speech. don't miss it.

Can you kill two enemies with one bullet? Can you run faster than light? Can you deliver punchy one-liners while a cigarette dangles from the lip? There is only one person who can... apna Rajni Anna! From being the highest paid actor to the most idolized silver screen star spanning fan clubs across all age groups. A humble tribute to the Cultural Icon of India. Watch this spoof and LOL.